...and what would life be without downs?

Especially since, its usually extreme highs and lows that prompt me to write.

I have a big thing for a job tomorrow that I suspect will go well, but overall... I've had an unexplained 'bleh' mood lingering lately. No particular reason, honestly. I can make excuses and find reasons, but the reality is... I'm just down.

Without stretching to other reasons that are really after-effect points, the only valid reasons I can possibly think of are money, activity level, and hobbies.

Money has always, and probably will always be an issue- thats life. Getting laid off and not working for a month and a half has had numerous effects... There are bills to pay, plus its harder to get back into the swing of things. I've also been unable to attend class this semester due to a lack of funds (and NO financial aid possibilities), and that's always a little disappointing.

Activity level I think is the main reason. I've been entirely too sedentary. I could always get up and head to the gym... but why, when I can sit behind my computer on my lazy ass and bitch about it?

Hobbies have always been my achilles heel. My lack of proficiency with the guitar has always irritated me, and it seems to be more prevalent every time I pick one of my guitars up. Maybe its time to sell them and pick up something different.

Blah. Can't wait till this passes.

it's getting ok now.

Why must I think of this until I find
Peace and quiet in the clouding of my mind
There are times but I never come around
I can tell things are getting ok now


Definitely is. Moved to the new apartment, have my head back on straight, and things are going well. I'm finishing out my first semester as a member of the SFCC Honors College with what looks like a 3.5, and things are going as well as can be expected. I lost my job a bit ago thanks to some layoffs, but I'm certain something will come along. I'm busy as hell, but it helps me to keep from getting bored.

While I haven't completely made peace with my parents (who don't want me to continue school... then again, they never did), things are going well with them. I've been able to see the start of positive change locally through my involvement in state/local PACs and the LP (as a hand working with a lot of other people), and finally managed to get two pets- even though they can be annoying little buggers.

To explain that one, I have two kittens- Brutus and Sammy. Brutus (male), obviously, Ohio State's Brutus the Buckeye. Sammy (female), is the most feminine I could make Samuel Adams... and no, I wasn't drunk- I've been studying his writings.

In other news, one thing that I never thought would last, although it has for a few weeks easily- I've made peace with former piece of my life. An old roommate, a few old friends, and while not with, but the feelings for my ex... of whom I am proud of, for having gotten a white house internship. I truly wish her the best and hope it is all she dreams it will be, and possibly opens some doors for her as far as her career is concerned. I feel a lot of that was getting things off my chest, and putting things together in my head. We were both wrong, and (even though I didn't realize it at the time) I was being awfully immature in handling the situation after the split. Eh, live - learn.

The only one I haven't quite gotten over is some remaining animosity from my former place of employment... but in time. The situation was pretty shitty, and I'm sure it was just as comfortable for other parties involved.

At any rate, I also picked up a new car. It's an 06 Subaru Impreza, and it's a BLAST! I'm registered for a few upcoming autocrosses as well as the 06 Subaru Challenge. Unfortunately, I don't know of many grass/dirt lots around here, otherwise she'd be a blast on those. Accelerating in the rain is fun :).

In the time between this apartment and Reflections, I lived in a shithole complex with Heather- who proved time and time again to be a true friend, and still is... I really miss living there with her. Just goes to show, no matter what the situation... a true friend makes it all easier... Especially knowing, she witnessed the lions share of my angst and frustration, as I as living out of boxes, entirely too overscheduled, and lost my job- all in that short month or two.

...but thats enough. I have 200 pages to read, a 10 page paper + presentation due monday, and three 4 page essays due tuesday... plus some unpacking.

'till next time...